News and items of interest

28 02 2008

Be sure to wipe your feet on the imaginary doormat Looks like construction of the “virtual fence” keeping those dastardly Mexicans out of our country will be delayed another three years, while lawmakers and Mexican immigrants try to figure out exactly what a “virtual” fence is supposed to stop. Apparently the Bush administration has been plagued with technical problems since the day the fence was conceived.

Of course, there’s a good chance that the engineers have managed to get this far by just telling W. to squint really really hard at the place where it’s supposed to be, and that if he believes in it enough, the fence will be there.

Crime considerably lowered in LA; Police blame Grand Theft Auto A gunman opened fire on a crowd of people at a bus stop in South Los Angeles, wounding either seven or eight people, depending on which paper you read. Four are listed in critical condition as of this moment, and the other three or four are probably not newsworthy. This has prompted investigators to wonder why their resident shooters have slacked off recently.

My guess is that it’s the virtual crackdown on crime.

Buckley Jr. defects to the Dead Party Famed conservative idealist and Robert Redford look-alike William F. Buckley Jr. died today. He had diabetes and emphysema, but medical examiners are still not sure what killed him. It may have been an accidental overdose of the prescription sleep-aid It was probably a combination of those two diseases, in concert with his old age and refined grumpiness.

For such a staunch conservative, 82 seems like a pretty strange age to die. He should have hedged his bets and kicked off at 40.




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